Movie Review - Star Trek Beyond

Star Trek Beyond took a page out of the James Bond playbook by featuring a song by a top recording artist.

  ‘Beyond’ is the third installment of the current Star Trek movie franchise and made its appearance in the local movie theatres last week. I went with Kathy and our neighbor Don to the local Fridley Theatre in Marshalltown Iowa on Saturday night to see it. The movie ‘only’ brought in around 60 million dollars on its opening weekend which made it the number one box office movie of the weekend but the lowest box office draw of the three Star Trek movies since the 2009 reboot.

  The theatre was sparsely filled on Saturday night which may be because the movie was on three screens along with three showings of the latest ‘Ice Age’ animated movie and two theaters of ‘Ghostbusters’. There was only room for a handful of other movies with 8 of the 13 screens being taken up by just three films.

  The movie starts out in a light hearted vein with Captain James T. Kirk trying to broker a peace deal with ferocious looking lion type aliens who are revealed to be the size of Chihuahuas. The Enterprise is in the third year of its five year mission to explore the galaxy and Kirk is questioning his commitment to explore space which seems to entail less adventure and more negotiation than he would like. As the Enterprise docks at the Yorktown starbase, Spock finds out about the passing of the Spock from the alternate reality that started the reboot (a nice homage to original Spock actor Leonard Nimoy who passed away in 2015) and decides to leave the Federation to help rebuild the Vulcan civilization. Before these ideas can be acted upon the Enterprise is drawn to the far-away Nebula on a rescue mission.

  This is a big budget movie (185 million) and the special effects showed no signs of skimping. The Yorktown starbase looked like something out of Inception or an M.C. Escher drawing with skyscrapers towering at seemingly impossible angles explained by the artificial gravitational fields that allows water fountains to flow normally while at a 90 degree angle to its adjoining building complex. The Nebula was a predictable jumble of asteroids to be avoided or crashed into but soon an epic space battle takes place when a swarm of ships of Krall (the bad guy of the movie) overwhelm the Enterprise and force a crash landing on Krall’s planet. The space battle was a little too frenetic for my tastes but was generally easy to follow.

  From there the crew is split up with most of them captured as prisoners waiting to have their life force sucked out from them to replenish the apparently ageless Krall’s energies. Spock and McCoy are stranded together and exchange some age old Spock-McCoy banter. The other group of non-prisoners comprise Kirk, Scotty, Chekov, and Jaylah the typical gorgeous exotic alien female who atypically fails to fall hopelessly in love with Captain Kirk. The group improbably finds an early generation Federation Starship on this planet on the edge of the galaxy, gets it in working order, rescues the prisoners, gets off the planet, and stops Krall from using his newly assembled doomsday device on the Yorktown starbase.

  That one paragraph synopsis probably makes the movie sound contrived but all the seemingly disjointed plot elements come together well before the end of the movie and in a way that makes sense in a Star Trek type of vein. The starship sequences were great and as I said earlier the wild architecture of the starbase was incredible. The script’s mix of action, humor, character interaction, and an understandable plot would not have been out of place in the original Star Trek television show which was so well written the show became an iconic franchise despite the special effects that were pretty poor even for the 1960’s.

  I found this to be a great movie because the Star Trek characters were portrayed exactly how I like to see them even though the faces were different. The interactions between McCoy and Spock were especially good with the good doctor playing the perfect straight man to bring out Spock’s nerdy dry wit. The changes in the characters from 50 years past are all for the better. Chris Pine isn’t as sure a starship captain as William Shatner or as gifted a fighter but his penchant for risk-taking and inventiveness surpasses the original. Karl Urban’s Dr. McCoy is more of an action type than the original and even takes a turn piloting a ship in this film. And as in the original series Mr. Spock steals the show and the movie is written for him to steal most of the scenes he appears in. Zachary Quinto correctly doesn’t try to imitate the classic Nimoy Spock but captures his unintentional humor and occasionally intentional jokes at McCoy’s expense. Chekov, Uhura, Sulu, and Scotty had about the same roles as they did in the television series which isn’t much except for Scotty needing a bit more screen time to keep the ships running.

  The only part of the movie I didn’t like was the juxtaposition between the angst of Kirk and Spock and Krall’s deep seated need to use his doomsday weapon against the Federation. While Krall’s motivations become clear as the movie progresses I didn’t understand how they convince Kirk and Spock to forego their well-considered plans to leave the Enterprise. That is a small quibble for an excellent film that ranks with ‘Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home’ and ‘Star Trek: First Contact’ as the best Star Trek movies made. Star Trek is a viable and popular brand. The movies are hits and a new television show (Star Trek: Discovery) is planned by CBS to lure subscribers to their non-broadcast ‘All Access’ platform. With all this success I can’t understand why a profitable movie series like Star Trek needs three and four years between movies. By the time the fourth (already approved) movie rolls around the characters will start getting too old and the series will need to be rebooted yet again. The cast has already lost one member with Chekov actor Anton Yelchin dying in a car accident last month. This is a shame because this version of Star Trek has a great mix of character interaction and action. The chemistry between Spock, Kirk, and McCoy is excellent and may be hard to reproduce with another cast. I wish Paramount and the movie makers would get cracking and give me a new Star Trek movie every year!

The Hard Way

  Just 3 days after the end of the NBA season the annual draft was held which led to player movement as some teams tried to move draft picks for players and other teams tried to move draft picks for players while still other teams tried to move up, down, and around in the draft. The most notable trades to my mind was the Brooklyn Nets trading useful veteran Thad Young to the Indiana Pacers for the 20th pick in the draft and the Orlando Magic getting center/forward Serge Ibaka from the Oklahoma City Thunder for the 11th pick and Victor Oladipo (the #2 pick in the entire draft three years ago). The Nets-Pacers trade is an example of the new Nets GM Sean Marks betting on himself to draft a better player than Young. I don’t understand what the Pacers see in Young that other teams don’t since they have a very good history of developing draft picks. The draft pick turned into Michigan guard Caris Levert and while the results of this trade won’t be known for a few years at least the Nets will save about $10 million a year for not having to pay Young. The Ibaka trade seems like a prelude to more Magic moves since they have already have a center in Nikola Vučević while the Thunder are trying to rebuild on the fly by trading Ibaka a year before he becomes a free agent and commands a huge chunk of the salary cap. Thunder GM Sam Presti has a good track record of drafting and picked center Domantas Sabonis with his pick and this will be another trade that will take years to judge.

  The New York Knicks General Manager Phil Jackson has won 11 titles as a coach but has had a rough go in his first two years running a team. His handpicked coach Derek Fischer didn’t make it through two seasons. Jackson seemingly hit a home run when he drafted Kristaps Porzingas at #4 last year. To my eyes Porzingas is talented but was hurt a lot in his rookie season. If Porzingas turns out to be injury prone he will fit right in with the Knicks new acquisitions Derrick Rose and Joakim Noah, who were both with the Bulls last year. Rose was the 2011 NBA MVP but has been plagued by knee injuries since. He played a total of 49 games in three seasons (2012-2014) although he has made it into 117 games the past two years. Noah followed his 2014 Defensive Player of the Year performance by playing in 96 games the past two years and is coming off shoulder surgery. Joining Porzingas, Rose, Noah, and max contract all-star Carmelo Anthony in the starting lineup is 30 year old Courtney Lee who is joining his 7th team proving that while he is a good enough player to be coveted by other teams he is not good enough for a team to resist letting him leave via trade or free agency. Jackson is one of my favorite coaches but as a General Manager he has proven to not be up to the task and this assemblage of all star players from 5 years ago looks like the same old quick fix that every Knicks general manager has failed with in the past 20 years.

  There are trades every year and the Knicks load up on yesteryear's all-stars every few years but it is very rare in the NBA that an MVP caliber player in his prime switches teams yet that is what happened earlier this month when superstar Kevin Durant left the Oklahoma City Thunder to join the Golden State Warriors. The only comparable movements of star players to my mind was Kareem Abdul-Jabbar forcing a trade from Milwaukee to the Lakers, Shaquille O’Neal leaving the Magic to join the Lakers as a free agent, and LeBron James leaving Cleveland for Miami and then heading back to Cleveland. I was too young for Wilt Chamberlain's moves from Philadelphia to California and back again which I assume were seismic in nature.

  It was widely expected that Durant would sign a short term deal with the Thunder and go into free agency for real next year but he chose a short term deal with the Warrior team that came within a few minutes of winning a second consecutive championship. At his press conference Durant said that he wanted to move on to a new chapter in his life by moving to California and thinks it is going to be a lot of fun to play in the Warriors winning culture with all-stars Draymond Green, Stephen Curry, and Klay Thompson.

  In order to get salary cap room to sign Durant, the Warriors had to part with five members of their championship rotation: centers Andrew Bogut and Festus Ezeli, forwards Harrison Barnes and Marresse Speights, and guard Leandro Barbosa. Of these five Bogut and Barbosa will be missed the most. Bogut provided height, defense, and off the ball offense while Barbosa was often the fastest player on the court even at the age of 33. Durant will be a direct replacement and a considerable upgrade for Barnes while Ezeli had fallen out of favor with the coaching staff.

  I find Durant’s decision very courageous. He signed a 2 year contract for $54 million when he could have gotten 5 years and over $130 from the Thunder. This is a lot of money to leave on the table. If the Warriors win at least one championship with Durant he will undoubtedly sign a long term deal but if the Warriors fail to win a championship the Durant will be pointed to (justly or not) as the reason for the failure, not being a championship caliber player, and I could see him accused of spoiling the camaraderie of the team by causing half the roster to be jettisoned in order to pay him. And don’t forget Durant is just one year removed from missing over half a season (including playoffs) with three foot operations. It appears to me that Durant is assuming large risks to his wallet and legacy in order to play on the Warriors. It would have been easy to collect the extra money and security with the Thunder but Durant took the hard way by taking a short term deal to play for a new team where he will likely get the lion’s share of the blame if the Warriors fail to win a championship and minimal credit for any of the teams future success.

  Do I think the Warriors will win the championship now that they have Durant? Probably, but they should have won the championship this past year and didn’t due to their injuries and their arrogance. Forward Draymond Green gives the Warriors a lot of their attitude but he spend the postseason punching and kicking opposing players in the groin, culminating in a suspension that cost the Warriors a chance to close out the series in 5 games. Green found himself arrested for assault in the off season. Green is starting to remind me of Dennis Rodman, a supremely talented hustle player that couldn’t stay out of trouble on or off the court. The team has no center, the bench is comprised of marginal veterans playing for minimal salaries, and there is no guarantee that Curry’s lower leg issues or Durant’s foot injury problems won’t resurface. The factor that mostly concerns me is the Warriors don’t have a quality center. When Bogut went down in Game 5 of the finals the Warriors were markedly worse defensively. Now Bogut is gone to clear the salary cap room for Durant with no replacement. This is not going to be much of a factor in the regular season but it is hard for me to see a team winning the championship without an above average center so matter how good the rest of the team is.

The Secret of My 'Success'...

After six years...a personal best...

  My email was down for a few days a couple of weeks ago so if you sent a congratulatory message about my reaching a new record high rating of 2277 on the chess.com ‘Tactics Trainer’ let me take this opportunity to say I wasn’t ignoring you (my email wasn’t working) and thank you for your congratulations. If you are in the minority of the thousand or so visitors I get every week to the Broken Pawn that haven’t forwarded their congratulations or perhaps didn’t even notice don’t worry because I’m going to tell you all about it.

  Chess.com is a free chess site with options to pay for additional features. I had a free account for many years until I started having my chess students playing on the site so I could monitor their progress (or lack thereof) by viewing their games. The free version of chess.com allows users to see the past month’s games. I had a need to occasionally look further back so I signed up for a premium membership which allows me to see the complete chess.com history of any user. Chess.com has over 50,000 puzzles in their Tactics Trainer. The puzzles are rated and timed which means a user will receive more points the quicker a puzzle is solved and if the puzzle is solved correctly but slowly the user may only gain a single point. Most puzzles are solved in multiple moves and partial credit is given if a user gets at least the first move in the sequence correctly.

  The site used to let nonpaying users solve three puzzles a day (since raised to five free puzzles) and when I first started using the site in 2010 I was a puzzle solving demon, hitting a high of 2268 on November 28th, 2010. Then I hit a wall and bounced around between 2000 and 2200 before switching to the untimed and unlimited puzzles on chesstempo.com in May of 2011.

  When I got the chess.com app for my amazing iPod I started doing my three free puzzles a day again when I found myself somewhere with wireless internet. I managed to get my puzzle rating over 2200 occasionally but more often found myself feeling rushed by the timed puzzles and making gut level decisions which dropped my puzzle rating to between 1800 and 2000 for most of 2013 and 2014.

  Once I got the premium chess.com membership I had access to unlimited puzzles instead of three or five a day. In January I had a puzzle rating of 1905 and set myself a goal to try to break my all-time high rating of 2268. I broke 2000 on February 7th, 2100 on April 13th, and got over 2200 on May 22nd. I got to 2260 on May 28th but was back down to 2025 on June 1st after some marathon puzzle solving sessions over the Memorial Day weekend which saw me only solve 489 of 1103 puzzles. I don’t know what made me attempt to solve so many puzzles but I’ve noticed I can become addicted to the puzzles and continually promise myself I’ll quit after ‘just one more’. I throttled back on the puzzle volume, broke 2200 again on June 17th and finally reached 2270 on June 27th, ending the day at 2277. Since then I’ve gotten my puzzle rating as high as 2286 and my new goal is to get to the rare air of 2400.

Here are three chess.com puzzles I ran into at the 2200 level. The puzzle on the left is a standard mate in two starting with Qh5+. The puzzle in the middle looks like there should be a checkmate but after Rf8+ and Rh3+ Black gives up his knight on f4 to avoid the checkmate. The puzzle on the right is trickier - Kb2 leaves the bishop only the g8 square when Rf6 forces the knight to f7 which allows Rg6 to force Bh7 and a rook fork on g7. Not easy but not impossible, especially if you see it more than once ;-)

  Attaining this personal best puzzle rating at the age of 55 ranks as one of the most meager of my many meager chess accomplishments. I know a number of players that struggle with the chess.com puzzles and so I am using this blog post to ‘pay it forward’ by outlining some simple tips for raising your chess.com puzzle rating.

1)  Use the app not the website
  In my opinion, the iPod app is perfectly configured for solving the puzzles and learning from them. The screen shows the puzzle and a timer with no distracting ads, pictures, or graphics. The website has a lot of excellent features including an incredibly detailed statistics page but using the app will keep you focused without any other screens or windows to distract you. In addition, the app has an analysis button on the bottom left that I will get to in tip 3.

2)  Understand the nature of the puzzles
  The chess.com puzzles repeat and repeat often. It is very important to subscribe to a premium service so you can see the same puzzles over and over without waiting for them to cycle through your three or five free puzzles a day. I’ve seen some of these puzzles so many times that I know the answer as soon as I see the problem. I have not seen this repeating action on the website which is another reason to use the app. Understanding that the puzzles are repeating should keep you motivated after a miss because as long as you learn the answer you will get more points from solving the puzzle eventually than you lost by your failure to solve it the first time you saw it.

Among the amazing array of statistics chess.com provides are the last 25 tactic puzzles attempted. Notice that puzzle #0039815 appears twice within 10 puzzles. This is not an uncommon occurrence when solving tactics puzzles on the chess.com iPod app.

3)  After a miss play it over and then use the analysis window to find out why your solution didn’t work
  This is the most important step in raising your puzzle rating. When a puzzle is completed, an analysis button appears. Pressing the analysis button brings up the puzzle’s starting point and a computer evaluation. It is important to see why the move you chose didn’t work and why the move the computer grades as correct does work. This will give you a sort of ‘muscle memory’. This process takes a bit of time (it is far easier on the app than the website in my opinion) but I have found that while my mind naturally gravitates to the same wrong moves I previously made after reviewing the solution I’ll catch myself because I’ve already seen why it doesn’t work. You should also do this if you happen to guess the correct solution if you aren’t completely sure why your answer was correct.

4)  Take your time always (and in all ways)
  It is important to take your time when solving the puzzles. Thinking about the ticking timer will distract you from the task at hand. Taking your time also applies to the process of figuring out why your answer was incorrect and why the listed solution works. Another way you can take your time is being patient when you fail to solve a few puzzles in a row. Get up, take a break, remember that you will see these same puzzles again, and remind yourself that as long as you remember the solution the outcome will be different next time! Another thing to remember is that the puzzles will get harder as your rating rises. This is no big deal but at some point you will cycle from the puzzles you know the solutions for into unfamiliar puzzles you will need to learn.

5)  When all else fails – cheat!
  If you come across a puzzle that you have no clue how to solve or get distracted for a few minutes and don’t want to lose any rating points for failing to solve the puzzle simply close the app or the browser! There is no penalty for not attempting to solve a puzzle – only for incorrectly solving the puzzle. Since this is by design I’m not sure it is even cheating. If you really want to cheat and getting a high puzzle rating on chess.com is THAT important you my advice (along with my profound sympathies) is to hire somebody to login to chess.com under your credentials to get you the high puzzle rating you desire so badly. Send me a private email for my rates!

6)  When cheating fails – cheat some more!
  Have you ever taken a test where you knew what the questions were going to be? You may say no but if you've ever taken a spelling test I believe you would have to say yes since the words you studied are the words which are going to be on the test. The chess.com app affords the same capabilities for those who are desperate to improve your chess.com puzzle rating but can't afford to have someone else attain their fraudulently high rating. Simply go into the Tactics Trainer and watch for the computer move. Then press the back arrow and the puzzle position will be on the home page next to the text inviting you to enter the Tactics Trainer! The position will not include the computer move you need to respond to which is why I advised you to remember it. You can put the position on a board and move the pieces and for the truly desperate you can even input the position into a computer to get the answer. When you have the answer reenter the 'Tactics Trainer' and the same puzzle will start over again with your timer still where it was when you exited the screen.

Clicking the top left arrow in the first picture will bring you back to the home screen that looks like the second picture. The position in the top thumbnail should look familiar. This is an unnecessary trick since the same exercises are given over and over. You could also just exit and reenter the app until you see the puzzle on the right and solve it (1.Rc3 b2 2.Bc1 b1=Q 3.Ra3#) repeatedly.

  I know that there will readers asking the burning question : What does this advice on getting a high chess.com puzzle rating has to do with getting better at chess? The answer is very little. There are thousands of books, blogs, articles, videos, websites, etc… to help people get better at chess and I don’t need to add to that menagerie. I am merely offering advice on the niche subject of getting a higher chess.com puzzle rating. I do want to stress that while this advice has worked for me your mileage may vary. If you want a higher puzzle rating on chess.com go ahead and give it a try – after all it’s not like I’m asking you to walk on hot coals or anything…

Do this!

not this...

Beagles and Beef Sticks

Once more it's time for America's most literate beagles - Daisy and Baxter to take over the Broken Pawn to talk about matters of vital importance (importance to beagles, that is).

Hi Baxter! Hi Daisy! It’s time for another blog for our readers! So many people liked our post about our staycation that Hank decided we needed to hurry up and write another post. But then I hurt my back! Owww. The vet gave you some pain pills and muscle relaxers and told you to take it easy for a few weeks. Kathy and Hank still wanted to take me on walks so Kathy fixed up a wagon that they could pull me around in. Nobody fixed up a wagon for me. I had to walk alongside but I don’t mind too much because I love to walk and I get to eat even more garbage off the streets because you can’t reach it from the wagon. I’m almost all better now but Kathy and Hank still take me in the wagon for some of my walks because my back isn’t all healed. Owww. You’re all better Baxter but the vet can’t cure you of being lazy so you just pretend your back still hurts so you can get pulled in a wagon instead of walking. Shhh Daisy! Hee…Hee…Hee…

Let’s stop talking about my bad back and get on to the topic of our post, Daisy! YES! Let’s! It was so exciting. We had our annual beef stick taste test on July 3rd. Ever since all the convenience stores in town raised their beef stick prices Hank and Kathy give us Simms brand beef stick treats from the Aldi supermarket. We love Aldi beef stick treats but we also miss our friends at the convenience stores and eating their premium beef stick treats. So once a year we sample the beef stick treats at all the local convenience stores and judge them. This is the fifth year of the annual Daisy and Baxter convenience store awards. We judge the convenience stores on the price and quality of the beef sticks… The friendliness of the convenience store clerks and the quality of the coffee or soda that Hank gets… And any extra amenities like crushed ice and restrooms should the need arise.

Vince sure looked Spiffy at the Jiffy!
Nothing can look nicer than these Jack Links beef sticks! YUM!!

Our first stop was to the Jiffy convenience store at 5am, Baxter. That’s right Daisy. Even though my back was hurting I pushed through the pain and walked two whole blocks before Hank put me in my wagon for the rest of the trip. Last year the Jiffy had dry Jack Links beef sticks and coffee that got Hank sick. He said it was like drinking battery acid! We weren’t expecting much better this year and it was no surprise that Vince was still working at the Jiffy. There was a surprise, Daisy. Vince had a uniform – a Phillips 66 shirt. Phillips 66 is the brand of gas the Jiffy sells. The parking lot was spotless. That’s not especially a good thing Baxter. It is not good, Daisy. We like to scrounge for garbage and old food the Jiffy customers leave in the parking lot. Hank was in the Jiffy for a few minutes and came out with a cup of coffee and 2 Jack Links beef sticks! He paid $2.46 just like last year - $1.29 for the beef sticks and $1.09 for the coffee. The beef sticks were the best ever! Big and long and meaty! They were the best beef sticks I've ever had, Daisy! YUM!! They weren’t dry like last year. They were very moist and tender without being watery. I’m giving the Jiffy 4 paws. I’m giving Jiffy 4 paws also, Baxter. The coffee was so good that Hank drank it all before we finished walking home. You and Kathy and Hank walked home. I walked a little but my back hurt (Owwww) and got to ride home in my wagon the rest of the way.

Jiffy – 4 paws 

---

The Food & Gas Mart has tiny Slim Jims and the world's nastiest clerk.
The picture in the middle made the nasty clerk go nuts!

At 9am we took our regular morning walk to the duck pond, Daisy. I walked a few blocks and then Hank pulled me in the wagon. Going to the duck pond is so much fun, Baxter. Hank takes pictures of the animals and Kathy gives bread to all the birds. YUM!! I love bread when that’s all there is to eat. Kathy gives us a little bit of bread too. Normally when we leave the duck pond Hank and Kathy give us Simms beef stick treats from the Aldi but today we didn’t get any treats. I was so sad. I was sad too until we made a left turn and headed to the Food and Gas Mart for more beef stick treats. The Food and Gas Mart is where the Kum & Go used to be. They sell gasoline, liquor, beer, cigarettes, snacks… AND beef stick treats!!! YUM!!! I love beef stick treats. Hank went in to get us some beef stick treats but he didn’t come out for a long time. The Food and Gas Mart only had tiny Slim Jim’s just like last year. But when Hank took a picture of the Slim Jim display the convenience store clerk went nuts! He told Hank that he had to delete the picture of the Slim Jim display! Hank tried to explain that he was an award-winning journalist researching the state of beef stick treats in convenience stores. But the clerk insisted Hank delete the picture. Hank told the clerk he if he didn’t want the money for the beef stick treats that was fine but he wasn’t going to delete the picture. That made the clerk even madder. Finally the clerk took the $1.07 for the three tiny Slim Jim treats and told Hank to keep out of his store. Then Hank asked the clerk for a receipt! That got the clerk even madder. Hank thinks the clerk got mad because they have so much drug paraphernalia in the store. I think the clerk didn’t want anyone to know he was charging tax on the beef stick treats. Hank then gave us the three Slim Jim treats. They were small and greasy and hardly worth the wait. I’d rather have had the Simms beef stick treats from the Aldi. Me too. I’m not giving the Food and Gas Mart any paws. What a nasty store. I’m not giving them any paws either, Daisy. The clerk even came out of the store to stare at us. Hank just pointed his camera at the nasty clerk and he ran back inside like a vampire. Hee..Hee...Hee

Food & Gas Mart - ZERO paws 

---

The Casey's lot is tastefully decorated with food posters.
And decorated inside with Old Wisconsin beef sticks! YUM!!

At noon we went for our normal walk past the apartment buildings where Spike the big dog used to live. We hadn’t seen Spike for a while. Hank asked Spike’s owner who said Spike ran away and the Animal Rescue League got him. We thought for sure he was a goner. But Kathy called the Animal Rescue League and they told her they found Spike a new home. That was nice. I’m not running away! I like my home just fine. Me too! Anyway instead of stopping at the apartment building for our Simms beef stick treats, we went an extra two blocks to the Casey’s for Old Wisconsin Beef Stick treats. YUM!! I love Old Wisconsin Beef Stick treats! YUM!! It was worth having Hank pull me all the way to Casey’s. I would have walked but my back started hurting (Owww). Sure, Baxter. It wasn’t very hot so we didn’t need to get a cup of ice water. Hank had to wait in line behind three people buying beer and cigarettes but then he came out with our Old Wisconsin beef stick treats. The Old Wisconsin beef sticks were tasty but since they have more water than Jack Links beef sticks they weren’t nearly as filling. I liked the Old Wisconsin beef sticks and I also thought they were a cut below the Jack Links treats we got from the Jiffy. I’m giving the Casey’s thee paws. I’m giving Casey’s four paws since if we needed a cup of crushed ice I’m sure they would have had one for us.

Casey's – 3 1/2 paws 

---

The Liquor Depot had more tiny Slim Jim beef sticks...
...but at least we didn't have to wait too long to eat them!

Our last stop on our beef stick journey was our 3pm walk when we stopped at The Liquor Depot to see what they had in the way of beef stick treats. The Liquor Depot is just a few blocks away on the street where we live. Occasionally Hank and Kathy get lottery tickets and then they get some Slim Jim beef stick treats for us. Slim Jims are small and greasy but since we’re beagles we love them anyway and always think we are going to get some premium beef stick treats when we stop there. The Liquor Depot is next door to Ecklor’s laundromat. There are always a lot of people washing their clothes and getting liquor and cigarettes at The Depot while they are waiting. Everyone in town except Hank and Kathy drink lots of beer and liquor and smoke lots of cigarettes so The Liquor Depot is usually pretty busy. We were lucky this day because Hank was back in less than a minute. But when he came out… He had the same 3 for a dollar Slim Jims that the nasty Food & Gas Mart had. I was so sad. The tiny Slim Jims were just as tiny and just as greasy as the ones we had at 9am. I don’t mind tiny Slim Jims, Daisy. When that’s all there is to eat they are my favorites! YUM!! I suppose they’re better than nothing and we didn’t have to wait very long. I’ll give The Liquor Depot one paw. I like that the Liquor Depot is so close so I’ll give them two paws. The only thing I didn’t like about my walk was that I had to walk almost the whole way. Oh you poor Baxter. I guess that means you're all better now.

Liquor Depot – 1 1/2 paws 

---

Well, that’s the end of our Daisy and Baxter beef stick awards for this year, Baxter. It was the closest race ever! And the tastiest! YUM!! Vince and the Jiffy won by half a paw over the Casey’s because of superior beef stick quality and coffee that Hank could drink. Congratulations to Vince and the Jiffy for being the 2016 Daisy and Baxter beef stick convenience store award winner! I hope next year the Liquor Depot and the Food and Gas Mart will take a lesson from Jiffy and Casey’s and lose the Slim Jims in favor of premium beef stick treats. I don’t think we’ll ever find out if the Food and Gas Mart gets premium beef sticks, Daisy. Why’s that, Baxter? Don’t you remember? The nasty clerk told Hank to keep out of his store. That’s all right Baxter. We’ll send Kathy in next year and maybe the Food and Gas Mart will read this and get Jack Links beef sticks just like the Jiffy does. OH BOY!! I can’t wait till next year! I love beef sticks! YUM!!