Waiting at the Wal-Mart

  The Yankee starting pitching was awful against the Texas Rangers and they were extremely lucky to get the win in game one over a melted down Ranger bullpen. I was so disgusted watching Sabathia, I turned the TV off and missed the excitement, only finding out the next morning. Sabathia was even worse than he was against the Twins and Hughes was worse than Sabathia. I’m hoping Pettite can stem the tide, but I keep flashing back to the 2001 World Series when he pitched against Randy Johnson and lost 16 to 1.

  I had ordered a new computer from HP over the internet and am slowly loading all my programs onto it. The upgrade has been fairly painless, although there are a number of programs that worked on Windows XP that need to be configured for Windows 7. I’m sure I’ll like Windows 7 as I get used to it, but for now it is just uncomfortable not knowing how to perform basic functions. I don’t think I felt the same way about Windows XP, which was very similar to Windows 95/98. At my old job where I wrote software that users would install on their computer, a new version of Windows often meant a lot of rushed changes as features that used to work would stop functioning with only a cryptic error message to go by.

  The highlight of the weekend was when I went to the Wal-Mart on Sunday morning to look for a piece of software for my computer. The Wal-Mart has always been good in allowing our chess club to meet there during the summer, but I don’t think it’s good for a town when one store has a better selection of software, books, video games, etc… for sale than any other store in town. There is one cashier that is covered with large warts. I can’t imagine having this affliction, but I always try to go into her line. Not only is she an efficient cashier, people peel off her line to go to a different cashier as they get closer to her. Unfortunately, she wasn’t working and even though I was in the express lane, I got stuck behind a person in a motorized wheelchair with a basket attached. The cashier had to walk around the counter to take each item out of the basket, take it back to scan it, put it in a bag, and walk back around the counter to put it in the basket. Luckily it was the express lane. When all the items were scanned, the customer swiped in their credit card, signed on the machine, but then STOOD UP, pulled out their checkbook, and then meticulously entered the purchase in the checkbook register, only sitting back down and motoring off when satisfied that the correct day was entered and 7 minus 8 was indeed 9. To pass the time, I composed a series of Wal-Mart haikus based on this and other visits to America's favorite store:

Bursting at the seams
Wal-Mart men all notice me
Clothes too tight to breathe

Shopping with food stamps
Children hanging on the cart
I’m pregnant again

In line at Wal-Mart
Behind the wheelchair person
Out comes the checkbook

  I’d like to publish these, but I don’t think the biggest book store in town would be interested in selling them.